Dare to Be Kind

Starred review from January 23, 2017
Debut author and motivational speaker Velasquez delivers a heartfelt and powerful treatise about the importance of being kind, gleaned from first-hand experience. The author, who has neonatal progeroid syndrome, a rare combination of Marfan syndrome and lipodystrophy that prevents her from gaining weight, was bullied in school and online. One day she found that a picture of her had been made into a cruel meme that identified her as the “world’s ugliest woman,” accompanied by comments like “Why didn’t her parents abort her?” “Not one comment was kind,” Velasquez remembers. Velasquez’s solution to this kind of harassment is to create a “culture of kindness,” extended even toward bullies. This might seem inconceivable, she admits, but she believes it’s the only way to solve the problem of bullying. She also points out that serious challenges can bring personal depth and understanding that’s impossible without those lessons. The author doesn’t pretend to be a Pollyanna, however—like anyone else, she has faced dark times, even becoming for a time addicted to anti-anxiety meds. Velasquez counsels readers to lose the shame over their problems—it’s a complete waste of time and energy—and focus on their own gifts. Readers will be inspired by Velasquez’s resilient spirit. Agent: Cassie Hanjian, Waxman Leavell Literary.

May 1, 2017
Velasquez knows about bullying. At age 17 she was surfing YouTube when she came across a video called World's Ugliest Woman, consisting of a single photoof her. She was born with a very rare syndrome that, among other things, prevents her from gaining weight and causes her to look different. Though she could have allowed the video to define her, Velasquez went on to become an influential motivational speaker and antibullying activist. Though at first hers might sound like just another self-help book, Velasquez, with coauthor Morris, accomplishes much more than that. Probing her own fears and feelings of inadequacy as well as opening up about her struggles with depression, anxiety, and abuse of prescription drugs, Velasquez is brave in her vulnerability. Eschewing victimhood, Velasquez argues that everyone struggles with valleys in life and though her valley is rarer, it is no different in depth and impact. This is a wonderful and fast read, full of vitality that captures the luminous spirit of kindness that Velasquez so beautifully embodies.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2017, American Library Association.)